Sleep deprivation

They say the first year is the hardest, and in some ways they are right. Oh I thought I knew. People told me how hard it would be. But until you have two babies at once (premies at that), going through the same stages together, you just can't completely understand it. I thought I had been tired before in the past. I had no idea the meaning of the word. Being that my girlies were so small, I had to make sure they were fed every 3 hours (from the time they started feeding). I couldn't feed them together as they were so little I had to feed them a particular way and keep a close eye. It took about half hour each to feed them, they'd have to be changed, and held upright for at least 15 minutes each because of their reflux issues. Then we'd hope they didn't get their clothes all wet (due to the reflux issues) because then we'd have to carefully change them without upsetting their stomachs more.

Even with Adams help it was quite the task. It was a bit of a blur, by the time I finished with the second baby, it would be almost time to start again with the first. I was lucky to get an hour or two of sleep total the entire night. My body has never felt that way before. Every joint and muscle protested. It hurt to walk, even when I did try to sleep my joints would hurt. I felt like an old woman hobbling around. I would fall asleep on the floor in their bedroom because I would be too tired to walk to the room over. Poor Adam and I both were a hot mess. He would wake up frantic in the middle of the night thinking our pillow was one of the babies and he'd have to get the pillow cases off our "babies". I'd find pillows strewn about in the morning all stripped of their pillow cases. Even I'd wake up holding the pillow thinking I was holding one of the babies.

Even now that my girls are older, I still have my moments. They still have some sleepless nights from not feeling well, or when they are teething. More then once, I have found halfway through the day, that my underwear were indeed inside out. Just yesterday I went out with the pup on a rare morning alone, thinking I had my act all together like a boss. About halfway through my run, I realized that no, I in fact do not have my act together. You see, my shirt was on inside out.

It does get easier over time and eventually you get somewhat used to having less sleep. Also, having a good support group helps a lot. We have fun stories to tell looking back of all the crazy things that happened in our sleep deprived state. I can now see why they have used sleep deprivation in war, although I doubt that would work on any of us MoM's! We are strong women!

Adam and I are lucky that we have such good people in our lives. For ex: our parents would come over and help us with vacuuming or laundry, try to let us catch a nap, some people would bring by dinners for us. It is a lot of work, especially in the beginning, so don't be afraid to ask for a little help.

Now our girls are active little ones, always chattering, laughing, and all over the place. It was nice when they were so little and slept and snuggled. I am enjoying this stage they are in now too. They are exploring the world around them and it is awesome to watch. We got them some little baby chicks. I already can see the girls are very interested in them. I am looking forward to see them interacting with them as they get older.